control has always been my vice
It was at the root of my eating disorder
It’s been the source of dysfunction + conflict in marriage
It’s been an overarching spiritual struggle
The posture of open hands in the posture, physically, mentally, emotionally & spiritually I have tried to adopt, even when it feels counterintuitive and awful to practice
What I’ve found with practicing is that you wake up each day, put in the work, do the reps & while you don’t see the progress that day, you look back a few weeks, months or years down the road and see the impact that decision to practice daily has made.
And that’s when you are able to reap the reward.
At 33 weeks we found out baby Boggs was breech. While he still has plenty of time to flip, it throws a curve ball into ‘the plan’ now with the possibility of a c-section being on the table
As we stared at the ultrasound this past week, another opportunity presented itself for me to practice open hands
Yes there are things I can do & believe me, I am doing them because I want this dude to flip (chiropractor, spinning babies, handstands, acupuncture etc.)
But more than anything, I’m committed to continually practicing opening my hands, relinquishing control over what I ultimately do not have control over anyways.
There’s something about the posture of open hands that is so freeing.
It’s a little scary, it not reflexive, but it’s freeing when I choose to practice it and lean into all the open handed-ness holds.
So here we are, in the home stretch of this pregnancy and season of eagerly awaiting, and our hands are open to receive what is sure to be the best earthside gift we could possibly imagine.
Photography by @jessharris.photogrphy
